the limitations of writing/second thoughts

Every once in a while, I start thinking a bit, and somewhat through about the limitations of writing, and specifically of what I do as a rule in writing a post everyday (except for Sunday) on this blog. My thinking when I get to this place has evolved, so that I’m ready now to accept the thought that my writing can have value in its place, and may help someone along the way, and as I have thought, and a friend recently said, it’s a part of my ongoing journey in sorting out things, trying to think through life, and specifically life in God through Christ.

We all have our elements and niches, some we’ve developed a skill in because we’ve had to in order to earn a living, true in my case. And others with which we have a natural attraction to, and affinity. I have always loved books, but have not been as good a reader as I would have liked. Just the same, they’re usually a companion, even if the learnedness some people think I have is actually second hand from people who really have read the sources, such as Karl Barth and the classics.

But while we each have the special thing we like to do, we could say, our element, humble as it may be, whether painting, music, science, whatever, none of that gets at the core of our being. We are all more than that. I remember the story of Thomas Aquinas, truly one of the greatest Christian minds, one of the greatest minds ever. Toward the end of his life, he has some kind of vision, maybe toward the Beatific vision of barely scratching the surface in apprehending as in knowing God. And he felt like all his writings, great as they actually were and are, were essentially worthless. He had in a sense seen the Truth, and the words he had written paled in comparison.

I find it interesting, for myself, that I can write a post, more or less be in it, and then forget it completely afterward. Often they’re written as an afterthought on reflections from my own life, as well as life in general, hopefully informed and formed by scripture, the gospel being the center in and through Christ, leading us to the life of the Trinity in and through him: the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.

I think whatever time I have left, I may want to major more on meditation and prayer. Maybe I’m a bit of a mystic at heart, certainly monastic and liturgical in my orientation, but in a loose way, given the life that I lead. But prayer, and working at that, and seeking to grow and become more familiar and at home in the rhythms that come from that, with for me scripture and the gospel being center in that, seems like it is at least the stopping place for me now, and perhaps the resting place from now on. Although such can easily be lost or weakened in the mayhem of life.

I am not crazy about all these “I’s,” “me’s” and “mines” so to speak, but we have to think of faith in relation to our lives as individuals, and together with others in the essential community of this life, and ultimately in the community of God. We each have our story to tell, our witness of God’s faithfulness in and through Jesus, and we’re on a different part of what for each of us is a unique journey, along with others on their unique journeys, while at the same time having to deal with the same things and with the same destination.

I hope I can keep writing, as long as life and mind allows, because that’s something I enjoy doing, hopefully with some benefit for a few along with myself as I share thoughts in common with us all. But I am aware of a new chapter which it seems I’m entering. We’ll see each other along the way and especially at the end, as we go on through this life, and especially in and through Jesus. As we seek to find our way more and more in and through him.

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